This entry has been revised - please see the new post here.
For millennia, the name "Medusa" has inspired dread - and we recall the beautiful and immortal woman who was changed into a monster… and whose glance turns men to stone.
For millennia, the name "Medusa" has inspired dread - and we recall the beautiful and immortal woman who was changed into a monster… and whose glance turns men to stone.
The best known version of her legend focuses on the prince who beheaded her. THE BLIND SCULPTOR is a split POV novel and gives this iconic villainess a voice for the first time.
Rejected by her parents, Medusa is raised by a priestess of the Goddess Athena. When she becomes a striking beauty, her uncle rapes her—inside the Temple of Athena, before Athena’s very eyes. Defying logic, Athena punishes Medusa for her uncle’s crime. As a result, Medusa’s legend is born: her hair twists with snakes, her face contorts hideously, and her gaze turns deadly.
Two hundred years later, Atheos, a slave and a stonemason, searches for Medusa. If he helps Prince Perseus kill her, he’ll gain his freedom. If he fails, he’ll either be turned to stone by Medusa or be executed by his king.
Before Atheos completes his quest, however, misfortune strikes.
The Goddess Athena deliberately targets Atheos, blinding and banishing him to a remote island. There he is cared for by a mysterious woman with a haunted past named Medi. An unexpected friendship grows between them, awakening Medi’s desire for a life beyond the island. When it becomes clear that Prince Perseus is after Medi’s head, the prince’s arrival spoils any hope of escape. Now, Medusa must overcome her betrayed trust - and choose between either helping Atheos or saving her own long, suffering life.
THE BLIND SCULPTOR is a completed 98,000 word work of historical fantasy.
Good job turning that around fast. Now I'm going to quibble with you on the little things.
ReplyDeleteFirst - I disagree that people don't know the story of Medusa. I don't really think your opening sentence is needed at all. Or it could be woven into the next line which is already stronger.
I would refrain from saying "for the first time". This made me do a google search on "novels from the point of view of medusa" and I turned up hits. They might be terrible novels, but it's not the first time. Giving her a voice should be sufficient enough to explain what your concept is. Good letting us know the split POV.
Paragraph 2 - good. We've got the POV of Medusa.
Paragraph 3 - good. We've got stakes.
Paragraph 4 - intriguing.
Paragraph 5 - wait. What happened to Medusa? I'm totally confused by the sudden shift to another location. When Medusa is mentioned at the end you talk about betrayed trust, but I've missed where this has happened.
The stakes for Medusa seem a little muddied - why would she want to save her own life if it sucks?
If you can clarify some of the questions raised by the last paragraph, I think you have something here.
I agree with M.A.
ReplyDeleteI think your third paragraph is where the story really starts. All the rest is backdrop. Starting with rejection, rape, and punishment of Medusa is a much better hook for an opening paragraph.
The fourth paragraph also works since this is a dual-POV novel.
The fifth was a bit confusing b/c in Atheos' paragraph it sounds like he's on a quest with Perseus, but then Atheos gets banished... how? Is this during the quest? If so, then is he separated from Perseus? Also as M.A. said, there needs to be a bit more clarity in the last paragraph. Maybe if you mentioned Medusa changing her name and fleeing to an island in the third paragraph this would help set up this last paragraph.
Anyway, sounds like an interesting twist on mythology.
Best Wishes,
Joseph