In a world full of secrets, Aislin Gray has a big one; she is a banshee and sees death.
On her eighteenth birthday, Aislin has her first Death Call, premonition of someone’s death, yet the death is of someone she loves. Kaelin O’Neil has resurfaced in her life only to be ripped out again with each passing vision. The visions may change, but his death remains the same; with nothing to lose, she tells him the secret she has kept hidden. Yet with his knowledge comes even more danger as both are flung into the thralls of life and death. Aislin must fight to keep Kaelin and herself alive; doing everything she can to protect their love.
Death Callers is a 52,000 word paranormal romance trilogy where fate meets defiance as love is thrown into the balance between life and death.
Your story sounds interesting! Just a couple things on the formatting front:
ReplyDeleteDon't indent your letter - this might just be a blog issue.
Things I would maybe change to give a couple sentences more punch:
I would put a period after - "...but his death remains the same." Then start a new sentence "With nothing to lose,..."
I would think about rewording "Yet with his knowledge comes even more danger..." This is an important stake and it feels flat to me.
I would also remove "trilogy" in the last sentence. Agents tend to shy away from any mention of a series, trilogy, ect. If you have to say anything at all, say: Death Callers is a 52,000 word paranormal romance where fate meets defiance as love is thrown into the balance between life and death. Although this is a standalone novel, it has series potential.
Or something like that.
Good job!
Hi Raven,
ReplyDeleteI like the sound of this but I think you need to make your query more specific. You have a lot of vague statements like "both are flung into the thralls of life and death" that don't give me any insight into what happens in your story. Try to write a synopsis of the plot and then work from there.
Good luck!
I think we need to know more about some of the other forces affecting Aislin and Kaelin. Obviously Aislin is in the know. But we're not. How is he going to die? Why? What happens if he is told? Is this set in Ireland? In a city? With their parents? At a college dorm?
ReplyDelete