REVISION - Exile - YA Fantasy - Eric Morgan

Exile is a 69,000 word YA Fantasy, told from two points of view: fifteen year old Jason and thirteen year old Phoenix.

Jason hopes to leave the remote salt mining city of Korenz and travel across the mountains to the great cities, just like his older brother. But unlike his brother, who is serious and practical, Jason's passion is for the guitar music of the Sedani, shifty nomads that ply the wilderness between the villages. When Paul is murdered by Sedani bandits, Jason's best friend's mother, a Sedani peace hostage, is attacked and killed by angry Korenzians. Korenzian priests decree that the body will remain unburied until the Sedani turn over the killers. Helping his best friend, Omar, will mean turning his back on his brother's murderers. When Jason acts, both young men must flee for their lives. Soon they are trapped underground in an ancient shrine to the Sedani goddess of music, surrounded by fanatical Korenzian clerics.

Far away, in the vast port city of Ephyra, the patriarch of a prominent merchant family has been poisoned. Following ancient tradition, his body is launched into the river Acheron in an enchanted boat, where it will enter the river cavern leading to the Underworld. His daughter Phoenix places a book of his favorite poems next to his beloved guitar and watches the boat disappear.

Within days, Phoenix watches with distress as her Uncle Gobbo moves in to take over her father's shipping fleet, bringing along a mysterious young man rumored to be a black sorcerer. Trusted henchmen and long time allies soon turn up dead. But most bewildering is her mother's weakness and passivity regarding Gobbo's disgusting behavior. Then one day her father comes to her in a dream and warns her that she must take her mother and flee. But running away will mean giving up her new position as an apprentice ballerina with the greatest ballet troupe in the world.

The goddess of music has the power to bring Jason, Omar, and Phoenix together, but they will need to trust one another to overcome their problems. And after what they've been through, trust is in short supply.

Ember - YA Science Fantasy - Victoria Davenport

Falcon has a past she can’t remember-- one the rebellion doesn’t want her to forget.

Living in the slums of exile, 17-year-old Falcon and her family—a pack of street-rat kids—rely on cunning, blades, and the grace of corrupt lords to survive in the toxic sludge heaps. They are still paying for the crimes of their forefathers—a century old rebellion that ended in exile. Now the Wall that isolates them is about to come down, giving them a chance at humanity once again.

Amarathines, a race of humans believed to be descended from the gods, are killed and harvested for the ancient magic that runs through their veins—magic that has the power to preserve life. The Sovereign of the empire breeds amaranthines solely to harvest them, using their blood to escape death yet another decade. Once the savior of the empire, he has become more god than man, and is spiraling out of control.

The long-running racial tension between humans and amaranthines erupts into violence, and half-amaranthine herself, Falcon becomes a target. The pack must learn to fight an enemy that can’t bleed: an empire overcome with hatred and greed, blindly descending into the chaos it came from. But as the pack fights their own war, the rebel Order has plans to ignite another—to reawaken the century-old rebellion and start a second Great War among all four empires. They will do anything to shape Falcon into the empress they need—an empress that will unite the races and bring peace back to Aurata.

None of this will matter if the Sovereign has his way, and the rebellion is crushed for good, before it can truly begin. The entirety of the Dregs will be enslaved to fuel his hunger for technology, power, and immortality—costing Falcon both her pack and her life.

EMBER is a YA science fantasy novel of 73,000 words that is the first in a planned duology. Told in four distinct points of view—including Falcon (who has yet to discover her true power), Crow (an ex-drug lord’s assassin seeking redemption), Electra (an undercover rebel agent and empire royalty), and the Sovereign of the empire himself—each perspective gives insight into the raw insides of their world, the dynamics of a patchwork family, and how Falcon plays a role in all of their lives, whether she knows it or not.

REVISED - Ensnared By You - Historical Romance - Lana Klaydon

Bred to strike hard and fast, Lysander belongs to an elite guild of assassins known as The Shadows. When their latest mission goes awry, he’s betrayed by his own and left for dead. From the depths of oblivion, Lysander awakens to an angel caressing him in the most intimate of places…and to find he’s a bedridden cripple. With the police hunting The Shadows, he’s trapped with no choice but to claim he has no recollection of who he is.

Spirited country miss Lady Olivia Woodward is mortified when she’s caught stroking him down there. In her defense, she was bathing him. It’s the least she could do after he took a bullet meant for her father. As death threats against her father escalate, Olivia nurses the enigmatic hero back to health. But he defies all rules of convalescence. He’s arrogant. Exasperating. Infuriating. And gorgeous as sin. Attraction sizzles as tempers fly, clashes of ire caving to torrid, delirious pleasure.

He’s no hero. Lysander knows every kiss is stolen, every touch forbidden. His past will resurface, and when it does, it will destroy Olivia’s trust...for he was sent to kill her father, not save him. As the police close in on unraveling his identity, The Shadows lurk in the darkness, reminding Lysander to finish his task. But they’re not the only ones after Olivia’s father. Another sinister force is at play, for the death threats are not The Shadows’ work. With the clock ticking down, Lysander is torn. Torn between duty to his brethren and risking everything for the only woman he’s ever loved.

Told in alternating POVs between Lysander and Olivia, ENSNARED BY YOU is a historical romance set in Victorian England, complete at 100,000 words.

REVISED x 3 - Evolution: Dauntless Hope - YA Urban Fantasy - Monica Hoffman

Fans of The Darkest Minds by Alexandria Bracken will enjoy EVOLUTION: DAUNTLESS HOPE a completed 95,000-word YA urban fantasy, set in a nation torn apart by hate with two species on the brink of a second war.

Hope’s power to control water, fire, earth, and air is the key to saving the Unies—super-humans—from extinction. It’s a secret kept from her until her forbidden love for a human boy threatens the Unies’ last chance for survival.

Hope thought she had everything she wanted the day she set foot in Brander High after years of homeschool. For the first time she has a BFF and a hot telepathic jock has a crush on her. But her life goes from cheery to downright wrong the night she and her BFF hide their identities to sneak into a Los Angeles night club. There she meets a handsome and mysterious human, Tristan. Before she knows it, he has her heart and she’s lying to everyone to keep their love a secret. She knows her relationship with Tristan could land her in Lockup or worse if they’re caught. What she didn’t anticipate is her reckless behavior jeopardizing the fate of every Uni.  

Born without the birthmark which connects all Unies, and the only Elemental in control of the four elements, Hope’s isolation as a child and the lies told were to keep her safe. A powerful human knows about her and has spent seventeen years looking for her because she’s destined to kill him. Now he has a weapon in arm’s reach and plans to eradicate the Uni problem for good. Hope is terrified of what she’ll have to release to stop him, knowing it might just kill her in the end, which she wants to avoid even if it means altering her destiny. Ultimately, she must decide if she’s willing to condemn an entire species to be with Tristan. Or will she become the Unies’ last beacon of hope, saving them from a fate where death is the only escape.

Revision x2 - Evolution: Dauntless Hope - Monica Hoffman

Fans of The Darkest Minds by Alexandria Bracken will enjoy EVOLUTION: DAUNTLESS HOPE a completed 95,000-word YA urban fantasy, set in a nation torn apart by hate with two species on the brink of a second war.

Hope’s power to control water, fire, earth, and air is the key to saving the Unies—super-humans—from extinction. A secret kept from her until her forbidden love for a human boy threatens the Unies’ last chance for survival.

Hope thought she had everything she wanted the day she set foot in Brander High after years of homeschool. For the first time she has a BFF and a hot telepathic jock has a crush on her. But her life goes from cheery to downright wrong the night she and her BFF hide their identities to sneak into a Los Angeles night club. There she meets a handsome and mysterious human, Tristan. Before she knows it, he has her heart and she’s lying to everyone to keep their love a secret. She knows her relationship with Tristan could land her in Lockup or worse if they’re caught. What she didn’t anticipate is her reckless behavior jeopardizing the fate of every Uni.  

Born without the birthmark which connects all Unies, and set apart due to her rarity, Hope’s isolation wasn’t a sick joke. A powerful human knows about her and has spent seventeen years looking for her. Now he has a weapon in arm’s reach and plans to eradicate the Uni problem for good. Hope is terrified of what she’ll have to release to stop him, knowing it might just kill her in the end. Ultimately, she must decide if she’s willing to condemn an entire species for Tristan. Or will she become the Unies’ last beacon of hope, saving them from a fate where death is the only escape.

REVISION - Music of the Night - NA Romance - Kathleen S. Allen

When aspiring, twenty-two-year old opera singer, Ash loses his lover and vocal coach, Isabette to a car crash, he’s devastated. His childhood friend, Teagan, comforts Ash in his grief and he realizes she’s more than a friend but he’s haunted by his love for Isabette. He begins to heal until Isabette’s ghost materializes and he enters into a possession pact tinged with regret and sadness so she can guide his career.

With Isabette’s vocal guidance, Ash lands a role in an upcoming opera. But when Isabette murders under the pretext of helping, he refuses to harbor her spirit any longer.

Determined to have the life she misses, Isabette takes over Teagan’s body. Ash is sickened by her actions, but she won’t return Teagan’s soul. The longer Isabette inhabits Teagan’s body, the less chance there is of Teagan ever returning. Ash must find a way to exorcise Isabette from Teagan before he loses the girl he truly loves.

MUSIC OF THE NIGHT is a NA romance, retelling of PHANTOM OF THE OPERA with a biracial male protagonist and a female "opera ghost." It is complete at 63,000 words. 

Thank you for your consideration.

Diamond on a Lizard's Tail - Mystery - Pat Harris

Dear Agent,

I am currently seeking representation for my mystery novel, DIAMOND ON A LIZARD’S TAIL (81,000 words).  Given your interest in mysteries, I thought it might be a good addition to your list.

When toxicologist Carol Westin is arrested for leaking classified information from the New Jersey Department of Health, she is not concerned at first. She didn’t do it, after all, and already has her hands full dealing with disgruntled citizen activists and appeasing smarmy political appointees.

 

But when Carol gets arrested again, this time for murder, and learns that someone is killing reporters to get to her files, she reluctantly turns to the only person who can help her, outrageous political blogger and self-described whistleblower, Bulldog Kominski. It was Bulldog’s post of the classified files that got Carol into trouble in the first place, and it’s Bulldog who must help her get out of it.  The trouble is, they can’t stand each other. 

When the unlikely duo finally come close to uncovering who leaked Carol’s files and who is killing people to get them, they discover a corrupt partnership that was hiding right under Carol’s nose all along.  

Having worked as an environmental scientist and managed a group of 60 environmental scientists, including toxicologists, in a state government research division for 20 years, I draw from a vast reservoir of experience.  I have published over 30 scientific articles alone and collaboratively in technical journals like Environmental Science and Technology, but this is my first piece of fiction.  

Thank you for your time and consideration.

Sincerely,

Pat Harris

Exile - YA Fantasy - Eric Morgan

Exile is a 69,000 word YA Fantasy, told from two points of view: fifteen year old Jason and thirteen year old Phoenix.

Jason hopes to leave the remote salt mining city of Korenz and travel across the mountains to the great cities, just like his older brother, Paul. But one day, his brother's new partner returns alone with the devastating news that Paul was murdered by Sedani bandits. Angry townspeople take immediate vengeance by killing the lone Sedani in Korenz, Jason's best friend's mother. On pain of death, her body is left in the street: no burial will be permitted until Paul's killers are turned over.

In order to help his friend, Jason must choose between Omar and his own clan. An overheard secret and the inscription on his guitar, "Music is a moral law," help him to choose.

Far away, in the great port city of Ephyra, the patriarch of a prominent merchant family has been poisoned. His daughter Phoenix watches with increasing distress when her Uncle Gobbo moves in to take over her father's shipping fleet, bringing along a mysterious young man rumored to be a black sorcerer. Trusted henchman and long time allies soon turn up dead. Finally, her father appears to her in a dream and warns her that she must take her mother and flee. But where will they go?

A Sedani goddess has the power to bring Jason, Omar, and Phoenix together, but they will need to trust one another to overcome their problems. And after what they've been through, trust is in short supply.

Death Callers - Paranormal Romance - Raven Hudgins

In a world full of secrets, Aislin Gray has a big one; she is a banshee and sees death.

            On her eighteenth birthday, Aislin has her first Death Call, premonition of someone’s death, yet the death is of someone she loves. Kaelin O’Neil has resurfaced in her life only to be ripped out again with each passing vision. The visions may change, but his death remains the same; with nothing to lose, she tells him the secret she has kept hidden. Yet with his knowledge comes even more danger as both are flung into the thralls of life and death. Aislin must fight to keep Kaelin and herself alive; doing everything she can to protect their love.

            Death Callers is a 52,000 word paranormal romance trilogy where fate meets defiance as love is thrown into the balance between life and death.

Night in Crimson Clouds - YA Fantasy - Sarah B. James

Upon discovering his powers, seventeen-year-old Michael Sullivan realizes he can become the best human ‘Hunter’ in his family. But if he decides to follow his girlfriend’s lead—a ‘Defender’—he might risk his life and his loved-ones. NIGHT IN CRIMSON CLOUDS is 108,000 words of YA fantasy with a strong touch of romantic flair.

Forced to face the consequences of a past known only by his girlfriend, Anahita, Michael must now fight his own heart before he stops someone else’s. Anahita tries to guide him into the Defender's path. But Michael, who lost both his brother and his friend to suicide and grew up through public executions, hopes only for a quiet life without having to kill people or blindly sacrifice his life for them. 

As his training begins with Anahita’s Defender family, Anahita becomes more and more afraid that she might be helping the boy who’s going to be her enemy one day. And when Michael takes one life to save another, he starts to believe his blood curses with the Hunters and there is nothing he can do. But the truth about his violent, forgotten past and the sacrifices Anahita has made for him will change his life forever, and Michael must now fight his greatest enemy—his own dark side—or lose all that he holds dear.

REVISED x 2 - XO - Adult Contemporary - M. A. Nicholson

 XO is a 90K Adult Contemporary interweaving two timelines.

Forty-one-year-old Juliet's marriage is on the brink. Her husband, Ethan, has already moved out because of her single act of infidelity. For months, she's fought to win back his trust, but she's exhausted and demoralized from apologizing to no avail. Out of nowhere, rose-colored memories of a boy she once loved surface and hit her at odd moments. With nostalgia and a little pride, she recalls how she once caught the eye of the unattainable Nick Hanson.

Sophomore Juliet has harbored an unrequited crush on senior Nick since the first day of high school. On her sixteenth birthday, when he finally reciprocates, she thinks her dreams have come true. But she soon learns that the emotions and sexual tensions of a romantic relationship are far more complex than she ever anticipated — especially when her new boyfriend has an abusive father, a stalker ex-girlfriend and a plan to leave home as soon as possible. Shell-shocked by the darkness in Nick’s life, her infatuation fades. She's far too young to realize her love for him surpasses the butterflies and tingles of a simple crush - until it's too late and Nick is miles away.

Now twenty-five years later, she looks Nick up on the internet believing she can innocently reminisce about times gone by. When she does contact him, she finds she has to reconcile her white-washed memories with hard truths she's pushed into the shadows of her mind. 

Faced with two failed relationships to repair, she's torn between rebuilding a secure future with Ethan and rekindling a past romance she already abandoned once before. But she's going to have to learn from history, or she's doomed to repeat it.

REVISED –The Birthday Jinx – MG Contemporary - Greg Pattridge

Hop Greenwood’s previous birthdays have plunged him into a series of bizarre and dangerous mishaps. From tumbling down the staircase in his electric car to a collision with a flying mattress, each birthday is worse than the last. Believing that his 12th birthday is going to do him in for good, Hop turns to a morning of juvenile delinquency to scare the curse away. He quickly discovers a life of crime is harder than it looks.

Desperate, Hop finds a real plan on the Internet for eliminating jinxes. Knock on wood. Just do a few good deeds and become a hero. Easy enough – right?. While he pursues this new path, his mother and father seem on the verge of a divorce; he’s about to make the transition to middle school; and his best friend is turning from a tomboy into a girl. With the clock ticking down to another disaster, a connection with an optimistic 98-year-old man and a classic book may convince Hop the jinx is not real. But will it be enough to keep Hop out of the E.R. and his family intact? This birthday will unwrap some surprising answers.

THE BIRTHDAY JINX is a 40,000-word offbeat contemporary middle grade novel. Thank you for your time and consideration.

REVISION - Evolution: Dauntless Hope - YA Urban Fantasy - Monica Hoffman

Hope’s power to control fire, water, earth, and air is the key in saving the Unies—super-humans—from extinction. A secret she didn’t know until her forbidden love for a human boy threatens her species’ last chance for survival.

Hope thought she had everything she wanted the day she set foot in Brander High after years of homeschool. For the first time she has a BFF, not to mention a hot telepathic jock has a crush on her. But her life goes from cheery to downright wrong the night she and her BFF hide their identities and sneak into a Los Angeles night club. There she meets a handsome and mysterious human, Tristan. Before she knows it, he has her heart, and she lying to everyone to keep their love a secret. She knows her relationship with Tristan could land her in Lockup, or worse if they’re caught. But what she didn’t anticipate, her reckless behavior jeopardizing the fate of every Uni.  

Born without the birthmark which connects all Unies, and set apart due her rarity, Hope’s isolation wasn’t a sick joke. A powerful human knows about her—he’s spent seventeen years looking for her. Now he has a bio-weapon in arm’s reach and plans to eradicate the Uni problem once and for all. Hope’s terrified of what she’ll have to release to stop him knowing it might just kill her in the end. Ultimately, she must decide if she’s willing to condemn an entire species for Tristan. Or she will become the Unies last beacon of hope, saving them from a fate worse than death.

EVOLUTION: DAUNTLESS HOPE is a completed 95,000-word YA urban fantasy set in a nation torn apart by hate, and two species on the brink of a second war. 

The Birthday Jinx – MG Contemporary – Greg Pattridge

A revision for this entry has been posted here.

Hop’s Greenwood’s previous birthdays have plunged him into a series of increasingly bizarre and dangerous mishaps. From tumbling down the staircase in his electric car to being flattened by a flying mattress, each birthday is worse than the last. Believing that his 12th birthday is going to do him in for good, Hop goes after several jinx cures he discovers on the Internet. The results aren’t what he expects, especially after a morning of juvenile delinquency to scare the curse away.

While he pursues more positive solutions, his mother and father seem on the verge of a divorce; he’s about to make the transition to middle school; and his best friend is turning from a tomboy into a girl. With the clock ticking down to another disaster, a connection with a 98-year-old man and a classic book may be his best chance. But will it be enough to keep Hop out of the E.R. and his family intact? This birthday will unwrap some surprising answers.

THE BIRTHDAY JINX is a 40,000-word offbeat contemporary middle grade novel now available for representation.

Ensnared by You - Adult Historical Romance - Lana Klaydon

Bred to strike hard and fast, Lysander belongs to an elite guild of assassins known as The Shadows. When their latest mission goes awry, he’s betrayed by his own and left for dead. From the depths of oblivion, Lysander awakens to a ravishing angel caressing him in the most intimate of places…and to find he’s crippled and immobile. With the police hunting The Shadows, he’s trapped with no choice but to claim he has no recollection of who he is.

Spirited country miss Lady Olivia Woodward is mortified when she’s caught stroking him down there. In her defense, she was bathing him. The enigmatic hero saved her father from a harrowing assassination attempt; the least she could do is nurse him back to health. But the man defies all rules of convalescence. He’s arrogant. Exasperating. Infuriating. And gorgeous as sin. Attraction sizzles as tempers fly, clashes of ire caving to torrid, delirious pleasure.

Drawn by her tender compassion, Lysander knows every kiss is stolen, every touch forbidden. His past will resurface, and when it does, it will destroy Olivia’s trust...for he was sent to kill her father, not save him. As the police close in on unraveling his identity, The Shadows lurk in the darkness, reminding Lysander to finish his task. But they’re not the only ones after Olivia’s father. A deranged madman is on the loose and will stop at nothing to annihilate Olivia’s entire family. With the clock ticking down, Lysander must choose. His loyalty torn, will he betray his brethren and risk everything for Olivia? Or will he stand by his allegiance, and lose the only woman he’s ever loved?

REVISED - January in Shadow - YA Contemporary Fantasy - Melissa Caruso

Fifteen-year-old January Stone desperately wants not to be alone. But she doesn’t realize being hard to find is the only thing keeping her alive.

January makes uncontrolled jumps across America in her sleep. With her world starting from scratch each morning, love seems impossible — until she meets Cassie, a haunted, bookish girl who isn’t willing to let January go. But when January reaches out to Cassie across the ever-changing distance that separates them, it reveals her to the Fallen: once-human monsters with pits of black mist for eyes. They’ve hunted her for years, and now they’re out to devour her soul.

She isn’t the only one they’re after. Running from the Fallen, January finds a place among her fellow Dreamwalkers: teens who protect sleeping minds from an invading presence that creates the Fallen and turns ordinary people into puppets. With friends at her side, January is ready to fight back at last... if she can keep the fractious Dreamwalkers from turning on each other. But when evidence surfaces of a traitor among them, January discovers a secret burden from her own past that may force her to abandon Cassie — or become a Fallen herself.

JANUARY IN SHADOW is a YA contemporary fantasy, complete at 65,000 words.

Ember - YA science fiction - Victoria Davenport

In the slums of exile, an age in the double digits is a badge.

With the pack of street-rat kids who became her unlikely family, 17-year-old Falcon fights for survival in a world reigned by drug lords, hunger, and toxic sludge. But everything they know about survival is about to change.

The Wall that isolates their world into exile is about to come down. It is a catalyst in a century-old rebellion, and a plot that could cost Falcon both her life and her family. As violence escalates between humans and genetically engineered synthetics, and rebellion spreads like burning embers, the city of sludge is brewing, and dangerous. Falcon will have to stop surviving and start fighting in order to protect the only family she’s ever known. But for the first time, she’s fighting an enemy that can’t bleed, and she can’t face them alone.

EMBER is a soft sci-fi novel of 72,500 words that is the first in a planned duology. Told in four distinct points of view, each perspective gives insight into the raw insides of their world, the dynamics of a patchwork family, and how Falcon plays a role in all of their lives, whether she knows it or not.

Retelling of Phantom of the Opera - NA Romance - Kathleen S. Allen

63K

NA romance-retelling of Phantom of the Opera

When aspiring, twenty-two-year old opera singer, Ash loses his lover and vocal coach, Isabette to a car crash, his hopeful career takes a detour. With the unexpected help and comfort of his childhood friend, Teagan, Ash begins to heal until Isabette’s ghost materializes and offers to possess him to help guide his career. Desperate to be with her once more, he agrees.

With Isabette’s vocal guidance, he lands a role in an upcoming opera. But when Isabette murders in the guise of helping Ash’s operatic career, he refuses to harbor her spirit any longer.

Determined to have the life she misses, Isabette decides to take over Teagan’s body so she and Ash can be together like they planned. Ash is sickened by her actions, but she still won’t return Teagan’s soul. The longer Isabette inhabits Teagan’s body, the less chance there is of Teagan ever returning, which is just what Isabette wants. Ash must find a way to exorcise Isabette from Teagan before it’s too late.

REVISED - XO - Adult Contemporary - M. A. Nicholson

There's a revision to this entry here.

XO is a 90K Adult Contemporary interweaving two timelines.

Since the first day of high school, sophomore Juliet has harbored a crush on senior Nick. On her sixteenth birthday, when he finally reciprocates, she thinks her dreams have come true. But she soon learns that the emotions and sexual tensions of a romantic relationship are far more complex than she ever anticipated — especially when her new boyfriend has an abusive father, a stalker ex-girlfriend and a plan to leave home as soon as possible. Shell-shocked by the darkness in Nick’s life, her infatuation for him unexpectedly fades. So when Nick decides to escape his home life, she’s ready to let him go.

Twenty-five-years later, Juliet is forty-one with a teenage daughter and a crumbling marriage. Her husband, Ethan, has already moved out because of a single act of infidelity and she's fought hard to win back his trust. But she's exhausted from apologizing and in bad need of affection. Rose-colored memories of the boy she once loved and lost hit her at odd moments and she looks Nick up on the internet thinking she can innocently reminisce about times gone by. When she does contact Nick, she finds herself torn between rebuilding a secure future with Ethan and rekindling a past romance she already abandoned once before.

She's going to have to learn from history, or she's doomed to repeat it.

Help! I have no idea how to write a query?!

So you don't know how to write a query. You're not alone - a lot of us are new to this.

I would recommend you check out a great resource for learning how to format and pitch your book in a query: Query Shark. She takes queries like yours and mine and gives TOUGH advice to the authors on how to revise them and make them work. The real life examples are very helpful and maybe you'll see something that can help your own query out.

REVISED - Unbelievable Misadventures of Avery Mann - MG Contemporary Fantasy - Joseph Miller

Avery loves three things: comic books, magic tricks, and avoiding trouble. Too bad the T-word follows him around like a herd of black cats with long claws and sharp teeth. Even his eleventh birthday can't stop the parade of bad luck, which only gets worse when Mortissa, the Wicked Witch of the Midwest, tricks him into freeing a murderous raven named Nevermore from its cage. Not only does this magically bond him to the cold-blooded bird, but it also makes him a useful tool in the witch's plans to remake the world into a twisted fantasyland.

As if learning magic is real and storybook characters have been living in our world for ages weren't enough to take in, Avery also finds out his grandparents are magi, their cat is the real Cheshire, and Long John Silver runs a restaurant/spy ring in town. Oh, and to cap everything off, Avery discovers he has the ability to alter reality with his imagination.

Mind = Blown!

As his day goes from frying pan to fire, Avery discovers he's not the only child being used by Mortissa. Olivia, a girl who can grant wishes, is also under the witch's control. With time running out, Avery's only chance to throw a flying monkey wrench into Mortissa's plans is to break into Dante's Inferno and release her mother, the Wicked Witch of the East. Preferably, this would be a job for Superman, but since the slacker isn't around Avery and Olivia will need to summon their inner heroes and try to put things right themselves. And if they fail, Mortissa will be able to keep them as her slaves, the world as they know it might end, and Avery will never get to finish reading his Ultimate Spider-Man collection.

REVISED - Rescue Me - LGBT Romance - Kel Heinen

Jacoby Mortensen is at his wits end.

Life with an addict isn't easy and being the primary caregiver to someone who suffers from mental illness makes it twice as hard.  Jacoby said for better or for worse but he never dreamed that the definition of 'worse' would see Jimmy having a serious mental breakdown, losing his job, and damn near tearing their relationship to shreds in the process.

If Jimmy would keep on his psych meds, their marriage wouldn't be crumbling down around them and Jimmy wouldn't have lost his job.  These are the times Jacoby asks himself what he sees in Jimmy.  Then he remembers why he married him in the first place: he saw the potential that no one else could.  He knew Jimmy was capable of great things and he needed a chance to prove it.

Jimmy thinks he can take care of things fine on his own.  He starts self-medicating with weed, cocaine, anything he can hide from Jacoby.  He didn’t plan to confess his spiraling drug use to his boss, but his mouth gets ahead of his brain. When he confesses his problem to Jacoby, he thinks he’ll stick by him, like he always has.  But this time, Jacoby’s had enough. 

And when Jacoby confronts Jimmy about drug use, and going off his meds, it comes down to a violent show-down in the neighbor's yard.  Because not only is Jimmy hiding a slow relapse into drug abuse, he goes behind Jacoby's back and takes a job in California.  Jacoby knows what's waiting for Jimmy in California and it's more than a job: it's Brian, Jimmy's ex.  Refusing to leave Iowa, Jacoby flies out to California with an ultimatum: stop lying and decide if Jimmy's serious about their marriage.  Jimmy's done some awful things to Jacoby over the years, but Jacoby's never left him for good.  This time, it might be the only option Jacoby has left.

RESCUE ME is contemporary LGBT romance complete at 85,000 words.  Thank you for your time and consideration.

REVISED x 2 - The Blind Sculptor – Historical Fantasy - NayWrites

For millennia, the name "Medusa" has inspired dread – and the best known version of her myth focuses on the prince who beheaded her. THE BLIND SCULPTOR is a split POV novel giving this iconic villainess a new voice that will resonate with one in four women.

 Rejected by her divine parents for being born mortal, Medusa is raised by a priestess of the Goddess Athena. When she becomes a striking beauty, her uncle rapes her—inside the Temple of Athena, before Athena’s very eyes. Furious at the desecration of her temple, Athena defies logic and punishes Medusa for her uncle’s crime. As a result, Medusa’s legend is born: her hair twists with snakes, her face contorts hideously, and her gaze turns deadly—and she will have to live this way forever.

Two hundred years later, Atheos, a slave and a stonemason, searches for Medusa. If he helps Prince Perseus kill her, he’ll gain his freedom. If he fails, he’ll either be turned to stone by Medusa or be executed by his king.

Atheos, however, becomes another pawn in the Gods’ game for Medusa’s head—blinded and banished to a remote island, he is cared for by a mysterious woman with a haunted past named Medi.

As Atheos challenges her stories of family betrayal, an unexpected friendship grows between them, lifting her depression and suicidal tendencies.  Soon, Medi’s desire for freedom from her traumatic past, from her villainous reputation, and for a life beyond the island, is re-kindled.  But when Medusa accidentally learns Atheos’ dark secrets, she feels her trust in him was misplaced. With the prince’s arrival spoiling any hope of escape, Medusa must finally choose whose freedom, whose life, and whose destiny will be the stuff of legend.

Fate's Love - NA Contemporary Romance - Lianne Colton

FATE'S LOVE - NA Contemporary Romance

Livy never wanted to go to the stupid party, but every high schooler should experience at least one, right? Now, all she can think about is Ethan and his dark-eyes; full of promises she won’t ever let herself believe. Her dad taught her better than that after he cheated on her mom and abandoned them without so much as a goodbye. No, she’ll never end up heartbroken over some guy… but damn, those eyes.

Eight years later, Livy’s back in her hometown about to start grad school. She’s worked her ass off to get here, so is a little confounded she can’t shake the feeling that something’s missing—or someone. It’s been three years since she last saw Ethan. Walking away from him after he declared his feelings wasn’t one of her best moments, but she panicked and ran. Now they’re in the same town and Livy knows it won’t be long until their paths cross again. And when they do she isn’t sure she’ll be able to walk away this time.

Ethan waited once before; she hopes he’s still waiting, because maybe, just maybe, some things are worth the risk, after all.

 

Something Taken - Adult Crime Drama - Sue

Life is exciting when you’re on your own, making a new start and leaving your past behind. With supreme confidence in her eighteen years of experience, Terry does not recognize the pitfalls on the path to adulthood or the missteps that lead her astray.

A late night traffic stop by the police undermines her plan for independence. Intimidated by his veiled threats, Terry submits to the cop’s demands. The pain, the fear, and knowing something is being taken that she can never get back, makes it worse. Already humiliated, she doesn’t realize he will use her capitulation as future consent.

Drugs hide her shame; her pup, Sprout, provides comfort. The officer is stalking her, but she cannot go to the police when one of their own is her attacker. Terry feels trapped, with Sprout as her only protector. When she loses the pup, her desperation to defend herself takes a deadly turn.

Confused and terrified, Terry hopes for one last chance. She calls on the person who promised to help her, if she would trust him. Now Terry must take the risk of placing herself under the protection of a deputy sheriff from the neighboring county.

Finding himself in a precarious situation of sheltering the suspect in a murder, Deputy Blakely confronts the slippery concept of justice.  Duty commands he turn her in; compassion tells him she may become a scapegoat for corruption.

SOMETHING TAKEN chronicles the a young woman’s desperate path to salvation in a difficult coming-of-age story, where growing up quickly is a necessity. Loosely based on actual events, the story is approached from a unique perspective. It is told first person by Terry, until the death of the Denver police officer. The narrative is then taken up first person by the Deputy, who investigates the murder with the help of his father, a retired deputy. The novel is complete at 110,000 words.

Query Clinic - Etiquette

Please - if you are asking for feedback from this group, offer criticism for others. :) 

The more you help others, the more you'll be able to take a step back and critique your own query.

REVISED - The Blind Sculptor – Historical Fantasy - NayWrites

This entry has been revised - please see the new post here.

For millennia, the name "Medusa" has inspired dread - and we recall the beautiful and immortal woman who was changed into a monster… and whose glance turns men to stone.

The best known version of her legend focuses on the prince who beheaded her. THE BLIND SCULPTOR is a split POV novel and gives this iconic villainess a voice for the first time.

Rejected by her parents, Medusa is raised by a priestess of the Goddess Athena. When she becomes a striking beauty, her uncle rapes her—inside the Temple of Athena, before Athena’s very eyes. Defying logic, Athena punishes Medusa for her uncle’s crime. As a result, Medusa’s legend is born: her hair twists with snakes, her face contorts hideously, and her gaze turns deadly. 

Two hundred years later, Atheos, a slave and a stonemason, searches for Medusa. If he helps Prince Perseus kill her, he’ll gain his freedom. If he fails, he’ll either be turned to stone by Medusa or be executed by his king.

Before Atheos completes his quest, however, misfortune strikes.

The Goddess Athena deliberately targets Atheos, blinding and banishing him to a remote island. There he is cared for by a mysterious woman with a haunted past named Medi. An unexpected friendship grows between them, awakening Medi’s desire for a life beyond the island.  When it becomes clear that Prince Perseus is after Medi’s head, the prince’s arrival spoils any hope of escape. Now, Medusa must overcome her betrayed trust - and choose between either helping Atheos or saving her own long, suffering life.

THE BLIND SCULPTOR is a completed 98,000 word work of historical fantasy.

The Blind Sculptor – Historical Fantasy - NayWrites

See revised version here.

For millennia, the name "Medusa" has inspired dread - and we recall the beautiful and immortal woman who was changed into a monster ... and whose glance turns men to stone.

The best known version of her legend focuses on the prince who beheaded her. THE BLIND SCULPTOR re-tells the story from her side, giving this iconic villainess a voice for the first time.

Rejected by her parents, Medusa is raised by a priestess of the Goddess Athena. When she becomes a striking beauty, her uncle rapes her—inside the Temple of Athena, before Athena’s very eyes. Defying logic, Athena punishes Medusa for her uncle’s crime. As a result, Medusa’s legend is born: her hair twists with snakes, her face contorts hideously, and her gaze turns deadly. 

Two hundred years later, Atheos, a slave and a stonemason, searches for Medusa. If he helps Prince Perseus kill her, he’ll gain his freedom. If he fails, he’ll either be turned to stone by Medusa or be executed by his king.

Before Atheos completes his quest, however, misfortune strikes.

Prince Perseus sneaks inside the palace of Lady Styx, where he is caught stealing weapons. To earn them and learn Medusa’s secret location, he must survive a coma. If he survives … Medusa - cousin of Perseus, Athena and the Lady Styx - will be murdered.  Lady Styx, who is known for her family loyalty, appeals to Athena for compassion on Medusa’s behalf.

Athena reluctantly agrees,… but deliberately targets Atheos, blinding him and banishing him to a remote island. There he is cared for by a mysterious woman with a haunted past named Medi. An unexpected friendship grows between them, awakening Medi’s desire for a life beyond the island. When Medi reveals that she is in fact Medusa, Atheos secretly petitions Athena to free Medusa from her fate of certain death at the hands of Perseus. Unmoved, Athena counters that Medusa’s blood will cure Atheos’ blindness, but only after her death, giving Atheos even more reason to carry out his original mission. When Medusa learns of Athena and Atheos’ prior encounter, his role in Perseus’ quest, and how he stands to benefit from her death, she must overcome her betrayed trust and choose between either helping Atheos or saving her own long, suffering life.

THE BLIND SCULPTOR is a completed 98,000 word work of historical fantasy.

The Unbelievable Misadventuers of Avery Mann - MG Contemporary Fantasy - Joseph Miller

A revision to this entry has been posted here.

Avery Mann’s biggest worry before his eleventh birthday is avoiding atomic wedgies from Max "The Wild Thing" Lovell. However, his fear of overstretched underwear vanishes when he becomes an unsuspecting pawn in a supernatural chess match between wise-guy magi, scheming witches, fiendish monsters, and storybook villains come to life. Getting dragged into an inter-dimensional conspiracy to remake the world into a twisted fantasyland throws a flying monkey wrench into his summer plans, which did not include magically bonding himself to a murderous raven or making fishy deals with Long John Silver. Worse yet, Avery's only chance to get out of this tangled web is to free the Wicked Witch of the East… from Dante's Inferno. And if he fails, his family will wake up to a different world, his newfound friends will be killed or imprisoned, and he'll never finish reading his Ultimate Spider-Man collection.

THE UNBELIEVABLE MISADVENTURES OF AVERY MANN is a 70,000 word long middle-grade contemporary fantasy book.

I am an award-winning writer in the role-playing game industry and an active member of the SCBWI. I also have a master’s degree in Library and Information Science with a focus on children services and literature. 

Rescue Me - LGBT Romance - Kel Heinen

A revised version of this query can now be found here.

Jacoby Mortensen is at his wits end.

Jacoby thinks his husband Jimmy needs a kick in the seat of his pants.  If Jimmy would keep on his psych meds, their marriage wouldn't be crumbling down around them and Jimmy wouldn't have lost his job.

But life with an addict isn't easy and being the primary caregiver to someone who suffers from mental illness makes it twice as hard.  Jacoby said for better or for worse but he never dreamed that the definition of 'worse' would see Jimmy having a serious mental breakdown, losing his job, and damn near tearing their relationship to shreds in the process.

Jimmy refuses to take care of himself, self-medicating with weed, cocaine, anything he can hide from Jacoby.  And when Jacoby confronts him about everything, it comes down to a violent show-down in the neighbor's yard.  Because not only is Jimmy hiding a slow relapse into drug abuse, he went behind Jacoby's back and took a job in California. Jacoby knows what's waiting for Jimmy in California and it's more than a job: it's Brian, Jimmy's ex.  Refusing to leave Iowa, Jacoby flies out to California with an ultimatum: stop lying and decide if Jimmy's serious about their marriage. Jimmy's done some awful things to Jacoby over the years, but Jacoby's never left him.  This time, it might be the only option Jacoby has left.

RESCUE ME is contemporary LGBT romance complete at 85,000 words.  Thank you for your time and consideration.

REVISED - Dark Core - YA Fantasy

Reincarnation can be a bitch, especially when a mad goddess keeps killing you. 

Seventeen year-old Saekina hides in the massive city of Dennin, alone against demonic assassins and their mysterious master. Not even her patron goddess has bothered to help her. She relies on her daggers, and strange, uncontrollable power that sends the demons fleeing.

Her solitude is broken when she meets three others also hunted by the assassins—and wielding the same power. For the first time in years she has friends, and she isn't about to let anyone hurt them.  They set out to discover the reason they are hunted, scouring the city for answers.

Their search drags them into the middle of a secret battle between the gods. Even worse, her patron goddess—someone who should be protecting her—is the one sending the demons after them, afraid they’ll access the memories from their past lives and with it, the knowledge to defeat her.

Saekina's blades and power are ready, but they can’t kill a god. To defeat her, Saekina must delve into her past life and uncover the secret the goddess is so desperate to protect. If she fails, she and her friends be hunted throughout endless lives and forced into the same battle. If she succeeds, it might just kill her for good.

Full Moon Over Lagos - Historical Literary Fiction - Jenny Mundy-Castle

1970’s Lagos, Nigeria isn’t the best place for someone terrified of malaria, typhoid, and dengue fever. But for art history student Julianne Krueger, the chance to live there with her husband Theodore is reason enough to leave Boston. Once they’re in Nigeria, however, she gets hints about the dark side of her famous husband’s work. Though Theodore’s goal is to find a “cure” for schizophrenia, Julianne suspects his methodologies far more sinister, finding files that hint at dosing unwitting test subjects with LSD and depriving them of sleep for days.

 

While attempting to piece together the truth about Theodore, Julianne forms an alliance with Iyabo, a local artist with whom Julianne brings back an ancient tradition of indigo dyeing, forming a bustling business. However Ayo, Iyabo’s husband, helps Theodore with the bizarre work at the lab and will go to terrible lengths to keep Iyabo from Julianne.

 

As the two women plot to discover the truth, Julianne becomes pregnant. Though her happiness distracts briefly her from her mission, tragedy strikes when her child is stillborn, victim of a common parasite.

 

From the shattered pieces of her life, Julianne must recover everything, including her sanity. During this time, Theodore retreats further into his unethical research, more determined than ever to find a cure for madness. If Julianne and Iyabo can’t overcome their challenges, they risk losing their friendship and the lives of many they love as a result. 

 

Please consider FULL MOON OVER LAGOS, historical literary fiction complete at 67,000 words, which will appeal to readers of such works as Barbara Kingsolver’s The Poisonwood Bible and Chinua Achebe’sThings Fall Apart. A graduate of Columbia University’s Literature and Writing Program, I currently teach at the American International School of Abuja, Nigeria.

 

Cassia - Literary/Contemporary - Kristin Lanette Harris

As an arts reporter living in Deep Ellum, Tanya Falgoust is accepted as part of the underground arts district, but living among free thinkers and musicians doesn’t make her one of them. Then she meets Cassia, a performance artist with the power to both deepen her experience and strip the art community from her.

Sensual, rebellious Cassia struts onto the stage and into Tanya’s bed. No one knows who she is, but her beauty and talents as an actress and dancer captivates the local theater scene. Tanya is mesmerized by Cassia, and they quickly form a relationship. A close friend warns Tanya about Cassia, but she brushes him off. But when Cassia refuses to divulge anything about herself, where she lives, or even her real name, Tanya starts to realize her friend was right. And the secrets her lover’s hiding are deeper and more damaging than Tanya could imagine. As their relationship becomes more volatile, hurting others around them, Tanya must break from her desire for the performance artist before she loses the connections to the musicians who have accepted her into their community.

CASSIA bridges literary and commercial and is complete at 77,000 words.

I regularly attend DFW Writers’ Conference, and my debut novel, HOUSE OF THISTLES, was published by WeBook in November 2013.

Thank you for your consideration.

Sincerely,

Kristin Lanette Harris (AKA Lanette Kauten)

Evolution: Dauntless Hope - YA Urban Fantasy - Monica Hoffman

There is now a revision posted here.

Where X-men meets Romeo and Juliet, EVOLUTION: DAUNTLESS HOPE is a completed 95,000-word YA urban fantasy set in the year 2112. Hope’s limitless power to control fire, water, earth, and air is the key in saving her species from extinction—a fact she didn’t know until her forbidden love for one human threatens her species’ last chance for survival.

The night seventeen-year-old Hope sneaks into a LA night club, she didn’t expect to meet anyone who could leave her speechless—much less a mysterious and handsome human, who motivates her to break the number one rule—don’t fall in love with a human. But each time she risks her life to send Tristan letters, or cross the Altadena border to see him, she can forget her prophecy, which claims she’s the one who will somehow change the world for all super-humans (Unies), a burden she never wanted. For a time, she’s happy hiding behind the illusion that she’s a normal teen dealing with normal teen crap, and the world is at peace.

But she isn’t normal. The world is screwed up. And she can’t hide forever.

Unies are disappearing, deadly conflicts over land, property, and goods rage on. And everything becomes too real the night Hope finds an incoherent girl wandering a deserted street. A girl who looks too similar to Hope for it to be a coincidence. Everything she thought she knew, crumbles. All the secrets told to keep her safe, force her to see the harsh reality—LA’s most powerful leader, Kenric, is hunting for her, because he’s in her prophecy. He wants her dead before she kills him first. And worse, her own power could destroy her in the end. Now she must decide if she’ll face her fears, and the one man all Unies dread, becoming her species last beacon of hope. Or run away with Tristan, and save her life in the process. 

Dark Core - YA Fantasy

See revised version here.


Dear Agent,

Reincarnation can be a bitch, especially when a mad goddess keeps killing you.

Seventeen year-old Saekina has never had anyone but herself to rely on. Demons have hunted her since she was a child, her prayers for salvation have gone unanswered. Not even her patron goddess listens. Being alone in the massive city of Dennin is easier than risking someone she loves dying. All she needs is her daggers, and hope that her strange powers continue to work.

She meets three others with the same power—and the same demons. For the first time in years she has friends, and she isn't about to let anyone hurt them—demon or not.  The four set out to discover the reason they are hunted, scouring the city for answers.

Their search drags them into the middle of a secret battle between the gods. Even worse, her patron goddess—someone who should be protecting her—is the one sending the demons after them, afraid they’ll access the memories from their past lives and with it, the knowledge to defeat her.

Saekina’s blades are ready, but they can’t kill a god. To break free, she must delve into her past and uncover the secret the goddess is so desperate to protect. If she fails, they’ll all be hunted throughout endless lives. If she succeeds, it might just kill her for good.

DARK CORE is an 80,000 word young adult fantasy with series potential. Thank you for your time and consideration.